Ayoola Adetayo

<h2>For the side-chick, it is usually an endless loop of promises and empty dreams.</h2>

Men who cheat on their wives would always lay promises of leaving their wives in order to marry these other women. Accusations of being terrible in bed, being old and fat among other things will be thrown around against the wife regularly. But guess what? They still won’t leave her.

Men who cheat on their wives always seem to thrive on juggling their lives and sharing their time between their family and their secret affair. It is like biting huge chunks out of your cake every time and still having it right there in full.

<h2>These are reasons why cheating married men never leave their wife for side chick:</h2>

Men recognize the high standing they have in the society as married people and they usually&nbsp;do not want to lose out on that. Many of these cheating men are respected members of society’s institutions like church, mosques, companies, etc.

So to leave their wife for no reason, just to be with the side chick, mistress or sugar girl will be the very last thing on their minds.

They may pull of their wedding rings for days of cheating. But to let go of it completely is usually difficult for most married men. [Credit Le Club  Symphonie Getty Images]

Man pullling off wedding ring [Credit: Le Club/Symphonie Getty Images]

Man pullling off wedding ring [Credit Le Club  Symphonie Getty Images]

With statements like “all men cheat” and “it’s fine if he cheats so far he respects me enough to keep it away from me,” many women have given men hall passes to cheat as they want.

The bar is set lower when women intentionally choose to be in the dark concerning their husband’s sneaky ways. And by refusing to hold them to the expected standard of faithfulness, wives allow these men roam, waiting at home with open arms for whenever they return home.

And we really can’t blame women that much actually. Society has been so structured in a way that makes women believe and accept that having a man who cheats is better than being single at some certain age, or worse, being single with kids or being divorced.

ALSO READ: <a href="https://www.pulse.ng/lifestyle/relationships-weddings/why-you-should-have-no-problem-with-your-mans-side-chick-id8179052.html">Why your man's side chick is not your problem</a>

Married men cheat and somehow stay in love with their partner. [Credit: Shutterstock]

Now the idea that someone would love his wife and cheat on her may sound seriously conflicted but it does seem to happen. People who claim to love their wives have been known to have side chicks despite a staunch, unshakable decision to never let go of the wife no matter how good the mistress gets.

Many times for this kind of man, the side chick is just all fun and games and he must have already compartmentalised his mind to keep it that way forever. He’d rather replace the side chick than leave his wife for her.

Married men often want to continue enjoying the best of marriage and infidelity. [Credit: Starz]

Omari Hardwick and Lela Loren star as James 'Ghost' St. Patrick and Angela 'Angie' Valdez on the Starz TV show "Power".

Also, married men don’t leave their wives for side chicks because they want their children to grow in a ‘functional’ and ‘complete’ family.

<h2>5. Why disturb a formula that works?</h2>

If you have been giving him sex without commitment all along, allowing him the benefit of your luscious body before he returns to his family at night, why would he suddenly want to change that?

No one changes a working formula. A cheating man would always want to continue enjoying the best of both worlds. Why disrupt that?

Angela Valdez, James St Patrick [Credit Starz]

For the side-chick, it is usually an endless loop of promises and empty dreams.

5 reasons married men won't leave their wives for side-chicks

<h2>Several guys cringe or feel queasy at the thought and talk of women’s menstrual cycles, and that’s just sad.</h2>

It’s sad because as guys, you can’t forever hide from the subject, especially if you intend to marry a woman, or if you are already in a relationship with one.

During their monthly flow, women have been known to have mood swings [This is not limited to just five days in a month though. Stay woke, guys.

They’ve also been known to feel irritable, uncomfortable (especially those that suffer terrible cramps), hormonal shifts, some become hyperactive, some get so sluggish, super horny, angry, immobile and on and on.

While you are supposed to be a great boyfriend/husband at every point, these five [give or take] days require a little extra effort to make her comfortable and happy.

Some women get overly emotional when they are on their period. This is the best time to pamper her [Credit: xoNecole]

So below, with help and recommendation from women, we list six great ways to pamper your wife/girlfriend and be her champ when she has&nbsp;cramps.

Or tampons or menstrual cups or whatever she uses. Know the size, the brand your girl likes. Buy for her ahead of that time of the month, without being asked.

You actually can’t mess this one up. It often shows whether you care or not.

Be great when your woman is on her period. You just have to be.

A happy couple in their kitchen, cooking.

<h3>2. Become comfortable with the idea</h3>

If you are a guy that still gets freaked out or give disgusted facial expressions when women bring up menstruation talk, you need to look for a way to get used to the idea.

It’s all natural and the last thing your babe wants is for you to be acting childish like that.

Become comfortable with it. You actually should be worried for her if she does not do it. That’s how absolutely necessary it is.

ALSO READ: <a href="http://www.pulse.ng/relationships/loving-a-partner-with-acts-of-service-as-their-love-language-id7151030.html">What to do when your partner likes acts of service</a>

Both on Twitter and Instagram where a little survey was conducted about the subject of this article, almost all the women who commented asked that food should be brought to them.

“Buy me ice cream, buy me shawarma, cook for me and make me eat even if I don't want to,” says Twitter user, Omotola.

“Lots and lots of food…” requests Naomi, another Twitter user.

"Buy me food,” adds Lolah June.

For some, feeding the people they love is a real thing for them. Not necessarily acts of service, but specifically feeding them with healthy food they like. [Credit: Shutterstock]

So, there you have it guys, make sure you get your girl food when she’s on her period. You might want to consider not buying her sugary foods though, except she specifically requests. Eating sugary stuff on periods have been said to worsen cramps.

Women like belly rubs when they are on their periods. Aanu on Instagram, among many others, says “Pat her back, rub her tummy if you can”

Lolah June adds on Twitter that while on her period, she would love her man to “rub my stomach and my back” but he has to “stop immediately I ask him to.”

Also, you have to learn when to talk to her and when to leave her alone.

If she likes period sex, that is one thing you would have to consider doing. [Credit: Bustle]

A couple's intimacy can be boosted by the consumption of spicy foods [Credit: Bustle]

Whether you feel weird about this or not, <a href="http://www.pulse.ng/lifestyle/beauty-health/would-you-have-period-sex-with-your-partner-id7139177.html">period sex</a> is a thing and in fact, some women have been known to get so bloody horny [no puns intended] when on their periods than on normal days.

This is a sensitive issue though, and whether to indulge her during that period is something you will both have to work about between yourselves.

“If the guy is down for that, why not?” asks Kehinde.

You will be required to be sensitive to her moods, her needs and her desires. [Source: LovePanky]

Sad woman after a breakup [Source: LovePanky]

“Check up like every time to confirm no pain, just be extra sweet.” Tola, an Instagram user says.

“Know the details of her period. Like be able to tell when her next period will be, what she does to ease her pain and all,” Tosin adds.

“He should just be available. Stay beside her to keep her company (no excessive talk though) it pisses. Just let her feel at peace even in her woman storm,” Pheyi writes.

All in all, guys, while most of the things listed here apply to almost every woman, there are still little variations and moderation tailor-suited to your babe that you need to ask and learn from her.

How to be an amazing boyfriend when your girl is on her period [Credit: DAN]

Several guys cringe or feel queasy at the thought and talk of women’s menstrual cycles, and that’s just sad.

6 ways to be an amazing boyfriend when your girl is on her period

<h2>Before explaining why body counts should not be a subject of conversation in your relationship, it is important to explain what it means.</h2>

Simply put, body count is the number of people you have sex with. It does not matter how intimate the make out was, or how much stuff you have done with someone, if there hasn't been penetration, it does not count as sex in this context. Body count here refers only to the number of people you have had penetrative sex with.

<h2>Sharing the past in new relationships</h2>

For every new relationship you find yourself in, there comes a time when you and your partner speak of the past and plan for the future, especially when things are becoming pretty serious and commitment is becoming genuine.

As explained in previous articles; there are <a href="http://www.pulse.ng/lifestyle/relationships-weddings/the-5-financial-talks-to-have-with-bae-before-marriage-id6440286.html">financial conversations</a> that are important at this stage as there are <a href="http://www.pulse.ng/lifestyle/relationships-weddings/5-sex-topics-you-must-discuss-before-settling-down-with-anyone-id8136973.html">sexual conversations</a> that one must have, too. Of all the sexual things you can ask from bae/boo though, the body count question is not necessary.

And this is simply because some things are just better left unknown, some information better left undiscovered. Let people divulge it willingly if they choose to. And if they don't, that's fine too. Don't bother them for it. Don't stress them about it.

Who a woman has slept with in the past should not suddenly make them unattractive to you, and should not affect their standing with you. Women don't think of the number of women a man has been with before loving them as they should. Why can't they be accorded the same courtesy? Besides, there's no assurance that the figure she'll tell you is the accurate thing. And how would you know if she downplayed the numbers just so you don't run off or start acting strange because of the truth?

Really, it's simple; if you think she is kind, smart, intelligent and fun to be with, how does her body count suddenly change all of the <a href="https://www.pulse.ng/lifestyle/relationships-weddings/rapper-zoro-says-positive-vibes-is-the-most-attractive-thing-a-woman-can-ever-have/ge2lxv8">positive vibes</a> you feel with her?

Who a woman has slept with does not affect her intelligence, smartness or suitability for you. [Credit: All This]

Woman stares blankly into space [Credit: All This]

You can ask if there have been any abortion; that is also a valid question to ask. I mean, this is someone you are getting serious or intend to get serious with, so that question is not unreasonable and deserves an answer, just as women deserve an answer when they ask if you have ever impregnated anyone or if you have a child somewhere.

ALSO READ: <a href="http://www.pulse.ng/lifestyle/relationships-weddings/is-it-ok-for-your-partner-to-be-friends-with-their-ex-id8146288.html">Is it OK for your partner to be friends with their ex?</a>

When you think about it, there really is nothing to gain from the body count information except that it satisfies your curiosity.

Sadly, many men can't even deal with this [Credit: Defender Network]

Even during fights, don't say things you do not mean [Credit: Defender Network]

Most times, guys can’t even deal with the truth especially when the babe in question is one that has truly explored her sexuality before they came into the picture.

There is no way to know the correct Nigerian stats, but in England in 2017, it was revealed that the average woman sleeps with eight guys before settling down. We think a huge number of Nigerian guys will estimate that as being too much.

This is where I get to talk about how unfair it is that guys could have slept with over 10 girls and will be hailed a champ and a woman does the same and she’s a tramp. That just doesn’t seem right especially now that gender equality is being called for more.

Who she's been with doesn't affect the quality of love she's capable of. [Credit Lionspot]

Learning to stay connected even at times when you both do not want sex is key [Credit Lionspot]

Back to the body count subject; to ask about your woman this question also puts your relationship in a precarious balance. If she’s been with more than a few guys and presumes that you’ll be staggered if she tells you, this will prompt her to come up with a lie; which of course is not what you want in your relationship.

If she trusts you with the truth, you may never be able to handle it. If your relationship is in a good place and everything is going great between your woman and you, you really do not need any inconsequential thing to upstage it. Let sleeping dogs lie, my guy.

If there ever was a list of information that do not have any bearing on that beautiful relationship/marriage happiness you seek, the body count question surely has to be in the top five.

Why you are better off breaking up than going on a break [Credit: Carros Imagenes]

Before explaining why body counts should not be a subject of conversation in your relationship, it is important to explain what it means.

Stop asking your girl for body count, you don't need to know

Is the love in your relationship real, or fake?

If it is, all you should do is keep growing the love, keep staying truthful to each other, keep drinking a lot of water, and just keep treating each other in all the good ways that will allow the relationship thrive further.

On the flipside, fake love is not something anyone would want to live with. Sadly, it is exactly what some people have in their relationships. If the relationship is based on anything different from a genuine willingness to see the other person flourish in every sense of the word, if it is based on something fleeting and temporary, then it is likely fake.

To really know that the love in your relationship is fake, here are some things you may want to watch out for:

<h3>1. They’re emotionally distant</h3>

In a relationship, fakers have a tendency to be non-communicative.&nbsp;They’ll provide little to no substance to what’s going on in their life.&nbsp;They’ll also make excuses why they “couldn’t” communicate especially when it is a little difficult to do so.

The difference between them and someone with genuine love for you is the extra effort needed to reach out when it’s not so easy.

If you are happy in a relationship, you need to look for a way to keep at it. If they make you happy, don't let it go. [Credit Freepik]

Why people never really forget their first love [Credit Freepik]

<h3>2. Always willing to throw in the towel</h3>

Conflict happens in&nbsp;every&nbsp;relationship. It demonstrates a level of care which partner have for one another.

That said, every conflict demands a resolution.If you’re the only one trying to resolve any conflict or problems that arise, it’s often a telltale sign of emotional detachment and this of course, is a major sign you’ll find in people who have got only fake love for you.

They really won’t care whether the relationship works or fails.

ALSO READ: <a href="https://www.pulse.ng/lifestyle/relationships-weddings/7-weirdest-things-men-find-attractive-in-women-id6252887.html">7 weirdest things men find attractive in women</a>

<h3>3. They don’t meet you halfway</h3>

Are you always the one to plan things? Check on the other person? Take responsibilities and all that? If so, what concessions, if any, is your partner making? Where’s the effort on their part?

Relationship and compromise are like two peas in a pod. A lack of effort is a universal sign of disinterest – and a relationship is no different.

A lack of effort from a partner is a universal sign of disinterest and you should not ignore it if you see the sign in a relationship [Credit - Shutterstock]

Let love be your greatest source of support

An authentic relationship sparks feelings of passion for each other. You’ll be curious, concerned, involved, etc in all that the other person does.

Someone who continuously acts indifferent isn’t engaged, likely detached, and unfit – not to mention unworthy – of a real relationship.

Many times, when someone doesn't really love you, you will know. There’s usually that sixth sense, that gut feeling in the pit of your stomach that keeps pricking you.

Add this to all the signs that you will see, and the picture is clear that this babe or that guy doesn't really love you. They’re only with you because they have no option, or for the money or some other fake reason.

Be honest with yourself. Are you wasting your time? Money? Energy?

Where partners choose to not express and discuss their issues, the end of that relationship might just be getting closer than they thought. [Credit: LovePanky]

To really know that the love in your relationship is genuine or not, here are some of the signs to look out for.

These are top 5 signs of fake love in a relationship

A lady in the streets and freak in the sheets is that babe who looks so&nbsp;presentable to the outside world, but totally cuts loose when she’s in the bedroom.

She gets wild and does sexual stuff guys only fantasize about, but you’d never think she’s such a ‘bad babe’ by just looking at her.

She’s the underrated sexual goddess. The type of girl guys always pray and ask cupid to send their way.

So here’s the ultimate test to know whether you fall in this category or not.

Below, we list all the signs that show that you are what every guy [allegedly] dreams of - a lady in the streets and freak in the sheets!

1. Your clothes are conservative in public, sure, but your closet is filled with the sexiest things ever. And you are always eager to turn your man to jelly by wearing them indoors. You actually derive joy in this.

2. Everyone thinks you are a virgin…&nbsp;but if they knew the extent of things you’ve tried and done...

3. When people say ‘the quiet girls are usually the worst,’ you can relate because that’s you they’re talking about!

4. People defend you behind your back that you’re the most innocent of the lot.

They argue with anyone that suggests anything sexual about you.

ALSO READ: <a href="http://www.pulse.ng/relationships/do-all-guys-like-ladies-in-the-streets-freak-in-the-sheets-id7134181.html">Do guys truly like women to be ladies in the streets &amp; freak in the sheets?</a>

5. You never lose your cool in public, no matter how turned on you are.

Even if&nbsp;your guy relentlessly flirts and says things that are driving you crazy and turning you all mushy, you always remain outwardly cool, calm and collected.

6. Your boyfriend pardons far too many mistakes.

He takes way more&nbsp;bullshit from you than he’s ever taken from anyone else he’s ever been in a relationship with. And you totally know why!

7. Not many people can sexually please a guy like you can and still pass the parent’s seal of approval test. No wonder why they keep begging you to come back to them!

8. All the guys you get down with express [pleasant] shock at how sexual you are.

9. Your imagination during sexting leaves your partner shocked and stunned.

10. You’re down for whatever in the sack, willing to try everything sexual instead of just deciding without actually trying them out!

Your nickname is Miss. Experimental.

Are you a lady in the street and freak in the sheets?

The ultimate test to know whether you fall in this category or not.

Signs that say you're a lady in the streets, freak in the sheets

In this article, we are going to discuss the 7 weirdest things men say they find attractive in women.

It is quite easy to guess what men generally find attractive in women-&nbsp;a pretty face, nice curves, good manners, and every other thing nice.

While we could go on mentioning the great, endearing attributes that almost every man would be attracted to in a heartbeat, we've also discovered, from research and questioning guys, that there are some weird things that men love about women, things you would never have guessed or imagined.

Some of these things are 'special' personal preferences, and some are a bit common among men... but they are all weird none-the-less.

Below, we list seven weird things men find attractive in women - watch out for number 3 and 4!

For some weird reason, some men like stubborn women. [Credit: Shutterstock]

This is why you should take a break from your partner.

Not weakness in the sense of being unable to stand up and speak for yourself, or being spineless but as Francis puts it "I like it when my girl calls me to help her solve riddles, lift stuff or provide answers to things that confuse her. I think it's so cute. Makes me feel like a man"

Everyone loves to have their ego stroked once in a while, right?

From the way men complain about women wasting time with makeup, it's quite strange to discover that some men actually love watching them apply it.

But Obinna really likes. "There's just something fascinating about watching my babe apply make up. I just sit down and watch her do all that stuff. I love it And of course, I love seeing her wear the makeup so gorgeously," he says.

Foundation for a relationship on fleek, maybe?

Okay. This is straight up weird AF. Who loves a stubborn woman, right?

Well, Chibuzor says; "I love stubbornness in a woman... I don't know why, I can't explain it, I just do."

It's probably something to do with knowing a woman can stand her ground, and insist when she needs to.

Never thought the word stretch-mark and attractive would ever be used in the same sentence but some guys actually find stretch marks attractive.

Folarin, 26, tells us that it's something about loving a woman "despite her imperfections."

ALSO READ: <a href="https://www.pulse.ng/lifestyle/relationships-weddings/heres-why-good-sex-keeps-you-with-a-bad-partner/2y5lm1e">Why good sex makes people stay in bad relationships</a>

Some men are attracted to women wearing glasses [Credit: Fotolia]

This is quite common and very understandable - women in glasses are usually very good looking.

Why this makes our list is because women who wear glasses sometimes fear they are unattractive because of that.

If only you knew how gorgeous those frames make you look!

No makeup faces are very attractive to some other men [Credit: BMI]

"I just like it when she can feel comfortable around me without makeup. I feel she needs to know that with or without makeup, I find her gorgeous" says Ibidapo.

While it is cool to be well-behaved, comported, and calm, quite a number of guys have also shown interest in women with clumsy, goofy sides - those who are not always serious or uptight and can make those crazy faces for selfies.

These Nigerian men talk to Pulse about their&nbsp;weird attractions, and unconventional things they find adorable.

7 weird things men find attractive in women

Couples giving and <a href="https://www.pulse.ng/lifestyle/relationships-weddings/how-to-always-make-a-partner-happy-when-their-love-language-is-receiving-gifts/s8xg8xr">receiving gifts</a> and other tangible, valuable things is a well-established relationship dynamic.

And here’s why: no relationship thrives without sharing – and this goes beyond the things you can see and touch.

Partners need to be able to give each other a corresponding amount of effort, respect, attention, love, affection… and yes, as many material things as each one can afford.

So if you are in a relationship with a guy who has problems sharing, especially material things, you are not overreacting by feeling uncomfortable with such behaviour.

And if you're wondering how to deal with this, we have the answers below

If you are dating a man who does not attach a lot of importance to sharing and generosity, these are steps you need to take to turn that around. [Credit: Peathegee Inc / Getty]

You may find out that you are actually your boyfriend’s side chick [Credit: Peathegee Inc / Getty]

<h2>This is how to cope with a stingy boyfriend or husband</h2>

Do any of these if your boyfriend or husband is certified stingy.

This is the first base of almost all relationship issues. Sometimes people do some wrong things not with the intention to hurt, but because they think it is the right thing to do.

By refusing to say anything and pretending all is fine when it’s not, you are not giving him the chance to know how you feel about his lack of sharing.

So whether it is his stinginess or even something else, do not hesitate to talk to him about it first and give him the opportunity to turn a new leaf.

ALSO READ: <a href="https://www.pulse.ng/lifestyle/relationships-weddings/emotional-intelligence-why-this-is-absolutely-necessary-for-happiness-in-your/rwn0zt2">What emotional intelligence means and why you can't last in a relationship without it</a>

It's great to not be dependent on a man but it's OK to realise that sharing is pretty nice in a relationship, too. [Credit: Giphy]

There’s also something to be said for ‘leading by example.’

In the present case, look for things he need, the gifts he’ll find most useful, then give him as much of that as you can find.

One of the ways to teach people how to relate with you is to relate with them in that same manner. Of course, it does not mean that they will get the clue and treat you like that, too; but it’s a step worth taking. Hopefully your man gets the point.

A happy relationship is not just one wherein partners share feelings and emotions. They share resources, too. [Source: Video Blocks]

A happy relationship [Source: Video Blocks]

<h3>3. Hope you’re making your own money?</h3>

You’re not asking for too much if you want a man to share material things with you. And especially if your <a href="https://www.pulse.ng/lifestyle/relationships-weddings/love-thursday-this-is-how-to-know-your-partners-love-language/c5xndgj">love language</a> is receiving gifts, that statement becomes a lot more accurate.

However, it is important to know that if this is the kind of relationship you want, you should not just be willing to spend that money on him or shower him with gifts and material things, you need to actually be able to.

Making your own money and being able to afford gifts for him gives the relationship a feel of mutuality rather than parasitism.

Having said that, it is important to note that a stingy boyfriend and a <a href="https://www.pulse.ng/lifestyle/relationships-weddings/why-would-women-rather-endure-abuse-than-date-broke-men-id8412823.html">broke boyfriend</a> are not the same.

Do this if your boyfriend or husband is certified stingy.

Stingy boyfriend? Here are 3 ways to turn that around

It’s that time of the year when people take stock of their activities to see how well they have done or how badly they have fared. We’re in the season of consideration, introspection and resolutions and decisions.

Year 2022 was such a long one, littered with its own <a href="https://www.pulse.ng/entertainment/celebrities/check-out-how-rita-dominic-and-her-husband-looked-at-their-white-wedding/jss7ezs">moments of magic</a>. Surely you must have felt some of it on a personal level: enchanting romantic moments, where your heart leapt and time seemed to have stood still; where all you could feel was the dream-like happiness coursing through your body, where your partner’s laughter was the light that brightened your path and led you through the day, through weeks, and maybe even months.

Those were the days when <a href="http://www.pulse.ng/lifestyle/relationships-weddings/guys-versus-babes-who-does-more-crazy-things-when-in-love/1e18b13">love was strong on your brain</a>, when it felt like you had something that would last forever; those were the days when it felt like heaven came down and bliss-filled your soul, sprinkled your heart with an unimaginable dose of happiness… when it felt like cupid, the angel of love himself, was beaming on you, and shining his good light on just you and yours, and nothing else, no one else in the world mattered.

But somewhere along the line, something changed. Things took a sharp turn from that happiness lane into a dark place where you are left feeling isolated and confused at the speed with which things went downhill.

Ayoola Adetayo

Articles written by the author

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