I struggled with being overweight since I was a kid. Every few years, I'd attempt to lose the weight. I'd see moderate success, reach a goal or milestone, and then think, done, fixed. But I'd eventually gain the weight back, plus some. It was a frustrating cycle, and I got to the point where I was just plain tired of thinking about it. So, I embraced the weight.

I accepted that I was a big girl, got comfortable with that, took pride in it, and loved myself where I was. While I'm glad I found that confidence, I also found myself reaching my heaviest ever weight and had some uncomfortable conversations with my doctor about my overall health.

I knew for a while that my habits with food weren't healthy, but it was easier to ignore than face those head-on. Even at my heaviest weight315 poundsI was confident and fairly happy. But I knew I wasn't living my best life. I was sedentary, tired most of the time, and experienced all kinds of miscellaneous aches and pains.

View this post on Instagram Last time I used this before pic in a #transformationtuesday post, I found myself trying to convince a lot of strangers that it really was me. This isnt a scam. They wanted so badly to believe that it couldnt be true. I get it. There are tons of products and programs out there that use shady marketing tactics. They doctor side by side photos, they promise quick results and minimal effort. Those things arent real. THIS is real. The work Ive done with @WW is real. It wasnt fast. It wasnt easy. Anything that promises you health or weight loss in a fast and easy way is lying to you. It takes work, and thats a tough thing to accept. I knew it would, and that kept me from trying for years. Avoiding the work left me at my heaviest ever weight - 315 lbs. I was scared of trying. Didnt want to fail. Didnt want to be uncomfortable. Eventually I accepted the reality - if I wanted to be the best version of myself for my husband, friends, family and work ... I had to be uncomfortable. I had to put in the work. I had to try. And it was going to take time. Here I am, 21 months into this journey and 146 lbs down. Ive made so much progress but I was only able to do that, and make it a sustainable, long term change, because I accepted that it wasnt going to be fast or easy. There is no quick fix. There is no secret. There is not trick I can share with you to make it happen. Make it easy. You have to be ready to fight for it. And you should, because you are worth it and I promise you wont regret it. - #ww #wwcommunity #wwfreestyle #wellnessthatworks #weightlosstransformation #weightlossjourney #weightloss #beforeandafter #beforeandafterweightloss #beforeandduring #beforeandduringweightloss #katcrew #katcrewslay A post shared by Erica Leigh (@sweet_pea_leigh) on Sep 3, 2019 at 2:48pm PDT

During the winter of 2017, I had a tough realization: I was treating food like a drug.

I was finding any excuse to eat, until I was physically sick, and then lying about how much or how often I was eating. I was also overspending on food. This lack of control scared me. I didn't just need to cut back a little on calories and exercise a little bit more; I needed to make serious changes that addressed the damaging, frightening habits that had become my norm. So, on January 15, 2018, I joined WW (formerly Weight Watchers) and committed to embracing those big changesfor good.

It was important to me to find a sustainable program that was going to provide both structure and flexibility to enjoy lots of different types of food. For me, tracking foods using their points system just made sense. It was easy to make the program part of my daily routine. It was also important to me to remain open to trying new foods and recipes. I knew I couldn't keep eating what I was before WW, so I had to be openminded.

View this post on Instagram This #pawneegoddess and #troopbeverlyhills #wildernessgirl couldnt be happier to wrap up a great summer with my 4th solo overnight hike (although this one is only partially solo, since my dad met me at the campsite!) I did my first one last summer - 16 miles, 2 days of backpacking. I was celebrating my 75 lb. milestone and loved every minute of that adventure. This summer, Im down nearly twice as much (146 lbs) and enjoying another 2 days of backpacking. Im toting a 30 lb backpack and, while Im a lot stronger than I was the first time around, its still a tough trek. Im so grateful to be at place in my life where I can chase my adventurous, outdoorsy side. - @ww #ww #wwcommunity #wwfreestyle #wellnessthatworks #weightlosstransformation #weightlossjourney #weightloss #beforeandafter #beforeandafterweightloss #beforeandduring #beforeandduringweightloss #katcrew #katcrewslay #facetofacefriday A post shared by Erica Leigh (@sweet_pea_leigh) on Aug 30, 2019 at 7:22pm PDT

Heres what I typically eat in a day now:

• Breakfast: One apple, one banana with a 1/2-tablespoon of peanut butter, one hard-boiled egg, one chicken sausage link, and a Western Bagel with a few sprays of I Can't Believe It's Not Butter. (I love the Cinnamon Spice Alternative Bagel!)
• Lunch: Leftovers for lunch are the easiest way for me to stay on track. I usually make roasted vegetables, air fryer chicken tenders, and brown rice to enjoy all week.
• Snacks: An apple and a mini Dive Bar (my favorite is the Trash Can Cookie flavor). I also love Snacklins (the Chesapeake Bay flavor is so, so good).
• Dinner: Salmon with sweet potato fries, both made in the air fryer, with steamed veggies.
• Dessert: I save room for a mini brownie sundae almost every night. I put a Fiber One 70-calorie brownie in the microwave to warm it, then top it with low-cal vanilla ice cream, sugar-free caramel, and strawberries.

View this post on Instagram Threw this shirt on for Sunday chores...realized its been a while since Ive worn it. -144 pounds since that photo on the left! Someone asked me about whether I get negative feedback re: side by side photos, in light of the body positive, self love movement. I havent, but I have thought a lot about that. I think the answer is complicated and personal. I 100% believe you should love yourself just as you are, but I also think its ok to want to change. Not improve, but change. I dont think Im a more valuable person now. I dont think I was a lesser human being before. When I started @ww January 2018, I went in with confidence. I felt good about myself, but I knew I wasnt taking the best care of myself that I could. Thats where my motivation came from. I wanted to feel better physically, not necessarily feel better about my physical appearance. Occasionally, well-meaning folks will say things about these side-by-side posts - some are tougher than others. Once, someone said you went from lime backer to cheerleader! Another person said I looked like a grandmother before. I struggle with that because, honestly, I knew I was overweight but I saw myself with kind eyes. I genuinely liked how I looked. So these weird compliments that imply I was somehow worse before can sting a bit. But I keep posting these because some days I cant see or feel the progress. And its a reminder of the results of my hard work. Each of us will have our own reasons for wanting to lose weight, get healthy, get stronger, etc. Maybe your reason is to look better. Its personal and thats ok. But, if youre diving in to a health journey, I hope you can go into with some level of confidence and self love. If its not there before, you may not find it after and that can be a tough thing to deal with. I loved that girl on the left and I love the girl on the right. And I think thats made all the difference this time around. - #ww #wwcommunity #wwfreestyle #wellnessthatworks #weightlosstransformation #weightlossjourney #weightloss #beforeandafter #beforeandafterweightloss #beforeandduring #beforeandduringweightloss #katcrew #katcrewslay A post shared by Erica Leigh (@sweet_pea_leigh) on Aug 18, 2019 at 1:02pm PDT

When I first started WW, I I resisted working out.

My attitude changed three months in and about 30 pounds down, when a friend of mine set me up with a personal trainer. I saw her once a week for 30 minutes. We focused on strength training, and I basically learned how to exercise.

I then took what I learned from her and worked out at home. For several months, I committed for 30 minutes of activity, three times a week. As I got stronger, I increased to four and then five times a week.

Eventually I even started running, which was something I thought I'd never do. I'm currently training for the Disney Princess Half Marathon in February. I work out six days a week now: three days of running and three days of strength/weight training. I'm obsessed with Danielle Pascente 's workout guides and have had great success with her programs.

View this post on Instagram 137 pounds since Jan 2018 with @ww and activity. At 315 lbs, my heaviest weight, I wasnt afraid of a bathing suit. I wasnt afraid to hit the beach or pool or jump off the dock into the lake. I didnt much care whether people thought I was too fat. I liked myself, I liked finding a cute bathing suit. I liked being in the water and enjoying the summer. Im glad I went into this with a solid foundation. Feeling (mostly) confident and happy with myself - that has helped a TON when it comes to plateaus, staying motivated, handling myself with care, and celebrating along the way. Im glad I still lived my life and did my thing before. Im also glad Ive shed the weight and improved my overall health too, because now theres literally NOTHING holding me back from doing the things I want to do (except maybe a decent amount of fear and self-preservation ). - #transformationtuesday @ww #ww #wwcommunity #wwfreestyle #wellnessthatworks #weightlosstransformation #weightlossjourney #weightloss #beforeandafter #beforeandafterweightloss #beforeandduring #beforeandduringweightloss #katcrew #katcrewslay A post shared by Erica Leigh (@sweet_pea_leigh) on Jul 16, 2019 at 6:11am PDT

It's the hardest days that count the most when you're losing weight.

Whether it's tracking, choosing the more nutritious option over the bigger indulgence, skipping the donuts on the counter at work, or working out when you don't feel like it, these little moments make up the journey. These moments are opportunities for you to commit daily to the life you're building for yourself. You'll never regret making the better choice when it feels so hard to do so.

I also still have to remind myself that there's no finish line. There will not be a time when I'm "done." There won't be a time when I can go back to the habits I had before and maintain the progress I've made. This was a tough pill to swallow, but accepting this and embracing it has allowed me to see a level of sustainability and success I've never seen before.

View this post on Instagram #tranformationtuesday, Anniversary Trip edition! Photos compliments of my loving husband. The first taken in Charlevoix, Michigan in 2017. The second taken a few days ago in Yellow Springs, Ohio. Im happy that Ive spent the past month or so maintaining. Between trips and treats, Ive worked hard to make sure Im striking a good balance. Enjoying a few sometimes foods alongside the good for you foods. Finding opportunities for activity, even during vacation mode. I havent hit the milestones I thought I would have by now, but I have learned that Ive come a long way. I have developed healthy behaviors with food that make this lifestyle sustainable. I still have a ways to go. Ive lost 138 pounds with @ww over the past 19 months and I still have another 40 or so to lose before I get to my goal. Its going to take a while to get there, but along the way, Im doing things that deserve to be celebrated just as much, if not more, than the number on the scale. Im running, adventuring, and exploring. Im enjoying treats occasionally and can be more flexible with how I spend my points. I can have a few wild days full of ice cream and pizza and get back on track when its all said and done. More importantly, I can enjoy those wild days and not beat myself up about it or feel guilty. This didnt happen overnight. No part of this has been fast. But it has been important. It will be sustainable. It has been life changing. - #ww #wwcommunity #wwfreestyle #wellnessthatworks #weightlosstransformation #weightlossjourney #weightloss #beforeandafter #beforeandafterweightloss #beforeandduring #beforeandduringweightloss #katcrew #katcrewslay A post shared by Erica Leigh (@sweet_pea_leigh) on Jul 9, 2019 at 11:22am PDT

Another huge lesson? Be kind to yourself, even the version of you in your "before" pics. When I tried losing weight in the past, it was tied up with the emotions and feelings that come with insecurity. I would think, I hate myself right now, and I'll like myself more when I lose the weight! and would then be disappointed when I started reaching my goals, but was still struggling with the self-love part.

This successful time around, I started at my heaviest weight but with the highest level of confidence I had ever had. I like my life now better, but I don't think I could have stayed consistent if I hadn't started in a place of confidence.

View this post on Instagram Alright, its time for an especially tough #transformationtuesday - bathing suit edition. Id never seen the photo on the left before today. I asked one of my pals if they had a pic of me in a bathing suit from one of our past friendcations, because I only had any from the neck up. I had very kind eyes when I was at my heaviest weight. I didnt see whats pretty clear in this photo. The photo on the left bums me out. I lived a much more difficult existence for a long time. I was tired, low energy, sedentary. Ive lost 136 pounds with @ww and exercise since January 2018. And Im pretty damn happy with myself these days! I was confident and happy then, but Im confident, happy and healthy now. - #ww #wwcommunity #wwfreestyle #wellnessthatworks #weightlosstransformation #weightlossjourney #weightloss #beforeandafter #beforeandafterweightloss #beforeandduring #beforeandduringweightloss #katcrew #katcrewslay A post shared by Erica Leigh (@sweet_pea_leigh) on May 14, 2019 at 5:23pm PDT

This progress didn't come easily and it didn't come fast, but I wouldn't change a single thing.

I don't wish that the process of losing weight had been faster or easier. I've learned *so* much about myself through this experience, and I continue to every day. This wouldn't have been possible if I woke up one day and I was magically at my goal.

I've worked hard and believe the changes I've made will be long term and sustainable because of the time it's taken to get where I am. If you have a significant amount of weight to lose, know that it will not be easy and it won't be quickbut it will be worth it. Be open to the hard days, be ready to learn, and celebrate the successes, both big and small.